Poetry

Here is a collection of my poetry, some of it written as early as 7th grade. Some of it's pretty rough; some is just silly. I'm a believer in allowing readers to make their own conclusions, using poetry to satisfy their own needs. Some poems could have a direct relation to my life; some could be a truth spun out of control; and some could be downright fiction - built from something I heard somewhere. Make of it as you will. Click on a link to read a specific poem, or just scroll down to view them all. I hope you enjoy.

(End)

The Age of Love (Top)

Pain swells within me,
The pain of loss
The loss of something that should never have been taken
Taken by the force of a cruel world
A world where love is of no importance
When you cannot love when you’re young
But what is this?
If this is not love . . .
A man to whom I would give everything,
Do anything for
But I couldn’t possibly be in love could I?
Is it lust?
No, how could it be? - It’s too pure
We fell in love before we even met
I loved him even when I had never felt his arms around me.
We needed each other.
We need each other.
So, just because we’re young by years,
They assume we’re young by mind and heart as well,
But I beg to differ,
I scream to differ!
I lie down and die to differ.
You do not know my love
You do not know what’s inside me
But he does
He sees it and he tells me
He loves me

The Best Friend (Top)

My friend you've been all year,
Always smiling, full of cheer.
You were always there when I needed you,
No matter what you needed to do.
Whether boys, or school, or anything else,
You never put me away on a shelf.
Smiles, and laughter, and other things,
Happiness is what your face brings.
Thanks for sticking by my side,
I love you always, that cannot hide.

Classifieds (Top)

I'm searching for a place
where I can thrive
where I can succeed

and excel

I'm searching for a place
lacking teenagers
and old bitties

and two-faced liars

I'm searching for a place
to release my talents
to learn

and grow

I'm searching for a place
and searching
and searching

and searching

I'm searching for a place
that doesn't exist
that will most likely

never be found

I'm searching for a place
where I can live
where I can work

and be happy

Could There Be? (Top)

Could there actually be someone out there who loves me?
Could there actually be someone out there who cares for me that much?
Could there actually be someone out there who hangs on my every word?
Could there actually be someone out there who wants to hold me?
Could there actually be someone out there who wants to be with me?
Could there actually be someone out there who wants me to feel good?
Could there actually be someone out there who wants to kiss me?
Could there actually be someone out there who wants to make me laugh?
Could there actually be someone out there who wants to make me happy?
Could there actually be someone out there who wants to see me smile?
Could there actually be someone out there who’s right for me?
Could there actually be someone out there?

Daddy Dearest (Top)

I am not your child
You're not even a real father
Don't tell me what to do
And don't tell me how to act
I don't need another parent
Especially one not even a year older than me
You think you know it all
With your preppy clothes
And your higher than thou attitude
You have all the answers
With your computers
And your fat paychecks
Yet you still struggle
To stay afloat
Don't pretend to be what you're not
I'm tired of your scare tactics
And I'm not eating off the floor
I know she loves you
I know you make her happy
And I'm fine with that
I'm glad for her
But if you have something to say to me
Then say it
If you don't like me
Then tell me
Be done with it
Have it out there
Let it be known that I get on your nerves
Tell me to leave
But don't pretend
You want to be my friend
You seem to be a good guy
Most of the time
But you've got to understand
That I'm sensitive
And that she needs me
For whatever reason
And I'm not going anywhere
I hope
So, don't try to teach me etiquette
Don't give me lessons on culture or taboos
Just leave me be
She likes me this way
And I'm sorry if you don't

Death to Him (Top)

Kill
Kill the man
The man who brings me pain
The pain of love
Love of another
Another who wants
Wants what I can’t give
Gives what I can’t have
Has what I need
Needs what I hate
Hates what I cherish
Cherishes what I resent
Resents what I feel
Feels what I do
Does what I wish
Wishes what I dream
Dreams what I can’t conceive
Conceives what I realize
Realizes what I ponder
Ponders what I don’t care
Cares about me
Me, who deserves no love
Love of a man
A man whom I wish to kill

Durley's Limerick (Top)

There once was a priest named Durley
Who acted kind of surly.
He’d pinch all the nuns
Then tell a few puns.
He had hair like a stooge named Curly.

Dream Visitors (Top)

I lied myself down
Immediately thoughts came
I closed my eyes
And the visions appeared

Bloody, beautiful bodies
All but one
That one special soul
So different from the rest

It was him
Who lured me here
Kept me coming back
Night after night

I walked up to him
In the usual manner
The manner I had
Many times before

Touching him thoughtfully
I noticed a change
He was so different
Than those rabid, radiant rogues

Indeed he was the same
In all his looks and mannerisms
But yet something
Held him apart

His eyes looked envious
Of what I had
Every loving look
Took me in with spite

He was still beautiful
Still boldly strange
But his blue eyes
Grew green before my own

I watched him
Wondering what he was seeing
Whispering softly
I willed myself to him

With teeth bared and eyes wide
He shouted and screamed
Rage shooting through him
Releasing to me

I cowered quietly
Questioning his intentions
Could this be the same spirit
The same magnificent mind

All faded to darkness
the demons dispersed and melted away
Now it was just him and me
And what he had to say

"I live in dreams
I die at dawn
You come and play
But then you’re gone

"My life ends
When you wake
Put on hold
For another day

"You live your life
But I don’t live mine
I survive
Only in your mind"

I sat and stared at him
Ashamed of myself
Being so happy
Not noticing his pain

What can I do
Could there be a way
For you to fall out of my dream
And fall into my life

"Tomorrow is Halloween
And the moon will be full
At tomorrow’s twilight
I will make my way

"Into your world
I will come with wide eyes
But I need your help
I need your thoughts"

Twilight came that next day
I visited him as I always did
I followed directions obediently
And then I discovered my doom

To this day
He visits me nightly
I cry and wait
For another to come

Soon one will come
And I will win him over
Then I, too
Will walk wide-eyed into the world again

Emotions (Top)

Why do I feel like this?
Why do I want to punch something?
Why am I crying?
Is it because I couldn’t find his coins?
Is it because he blew up at me?
Is it because we can’t be together?
Is it because my parents are assholes?
Is it because his are too?
Is it because he had to leave?
Is it because I love him so much?
What is going on inside me?
What are these emotions?
Why are they so undefined?
Why are they so strong?

Fame (Top)

Is this what you wanted
What you desired
Do you care what it's doing to me
How I feel
You push me and push me
Without heeding my cries
But I do as you wish
I bend to your will
With no concern for myself
Only you
Why only you...
Because it's all about you
All for you
You and you alone
My avid fan

The Fight (Top)

Why does life have to be so complicated?
Why do people have to be so crazy and obsessed?
Why can’t people listen and hear the truth?
Why do people feel the need to hurt people?
Why do people butt-in and tell others to too?
Why are rumors started?
Why do they have to be so cruel?
Why do people have to be so violent?
Why do people attack others verbally and physically?
Why do they make threats?
Why can’t we be sane?

Firsts (Top)

I can’t wait until the day we meet,
the day he first holds me in his arms,
the day he first presses his lips against mine,
the first smile upon his face,
his first loving embrace,
the first time we are together,
the first time will last forever.

For Me (Top)

This is my poetry.
It’s not for you.
These are my poems,
understood by few.

When I’m sad,
I write it down.
Through the words,
I am found.

I write a little
every night.
My pen lets loose,
and I take flight.

My thoughts flow free
through my mind.
If you read it,
my heart you’ll find.

It’s been broken
and mended again.
The wound has healed
through my pen.

My poetry is here
to help me through
the turmoil of life
and things I do.

You may not care
what it’s about.
You don’t care
what I’m about.

It’s about me
and what I want.
It’s not here
for you to taunt.

This is my soul
I pour to you;
a map of my head
for you I drew.

Do not shame me.
Do not make fun.
I give everything;
then I run.

I need this poetry
to sort my life,
to understand,
to cope with strife.

Leave me alone.
Let me be.
For this poetry
is just for me.

It’s not for you,
as I said before.
It’s for me,
to stop the war.

I keep writing
to lessen the pain,
to stop the tears,
to stop the rain.

I need this poetry
as my release.
I write until
my pain does cease.

This poem has now
reached an end.
One more time,
I’ve learned to bend.

You may not get
all I’ve said,
but I don’t care;
it’s from my head.

This is my poem’s
final words.
Did you care?
Was it absurd?

Forgive You? (Top)

Forgiveness is earned
No it's not
Forgiveness is more complexed
It is not just the understanding,
Not just the love
OR the rebuilding of trust
It is the elimination of the hurt
you caused me
That is hard to do
Near impossible
Because I understand,
I love you, and
Heaven knows why,
But I trust you
But I can't forgive you
Not yet
Not until the pain stops
Will it ever stop?

Gone Too Soon (Top)

You’re gone now
But I wasn’t finished with you
There’s still more I need from you

I never knew you

the real you
the human being

I’ve learned so much about you
Since you’ve been gone
Things I never knew before

I wish you were here

to tell me more
to teach me

I still need you

to help me with that recipe
to talk to him for me

At times I get mad at you

for not fighting harder
for not trying

I suppose it was your time
You had a full life
Your mission was complete

It doesn’t make it hurt any less though
I still need you

I still miss you

There are things I still want to know
Things I wish could have been

but weren’t

But you knew I loved you
And I knew you loved me
...But it still hurts...

I just wasn’t ready

Hell (Top)

Pain swells within me
I weep
The tears fall, and I cannot control them
Help me
I long for him to stop my torture
I wait
He remains far away, watching, grinning
He laughs
I cry to him, beg him to save me
I plead
He stares at me knowingly
He smiles
The flames get closer, and the temperature rises
I scream
He does nothing but watch without sympathy
I fall
The fire finally reaches me and begins to burn my flesh
He cries
I am turned to ash before his eyes
He reaches
He is too late; he cannot save me
I die
He weeps

Helpless (Top)

What is going on?
Something inside me wants to help
But I know there is nothing I can do
I know that I’m not needed
I know she can do it alone
But I feel like I should

do something

She is strong and she can make it
She is very capable
But I feel a responsibility
Although I had nothing to do with it
I want to help her
I want to hold her
Though we’ve never been that way
I want to cry for her
But she doesn’t even cry
She’s independent
She can do it
I know she can
I feel a need, though
Don’t ask why
I feel a burden
I love her
Closer than my sister
More than myself
She has always helped me
Been my rock
My support
What do I do now?
I am lost
And confused,
So helpless

Her Flower (Top)

Her flower is white,
So pure and beautiful.
She waters it every day
And watches it grow.

She treasures her flower,
Lets no one touch it,
Not even breathe on it.
She must protect it.

One day she becomes involved;
She runs here and there,
And occasionally she forgets
To water her precious flower.

Her flower is beginning to wilt,
But she doesn’t notice;
She doesn’t remember,
Doesn’t care.

Her mind is busy and jumbled;
Her worries are many.
She no longer thinks of her little flower
She once held above all else.

Her flower cries;
It calls to her,
But she passes by,
Ignoring its plea.

Suddenly she is not so preoccupied;
She has time to herself again.
She thinks on what to do
And remembers her flower.

She goes to her flower,
And looks at it,
Seeing death taking over it,
She sobs.

What has she done to her precious flower,
Her beautiful gift,
That once
Was so important to her?

Her white flower,
Now gray,
Drooped sadly
As her tears fell.

She could have prevented it,
Could have stopped the pain,
But she was having so much fun,
She hadn’t cared anymore.

Finally, as she watched,
Her little flower died,
Taking all its glory with it,
Draining light from the room.

She sat in the dark,
Thinking on what she had done,
Knowing now,
There was nothing she could do.

Because she got caught up,
Because she hadn’t cared,
Her flower wilted,
Her precious gift died.

Hold On

The closeness you can feel
to one person
is a mixed blessing.

The warmth and the joy
can complete you,
fill you up.

But sooner or later,
inevitably,
they will go.

So hold on to it now.
Don't ever let this chance
slip away.

I Know (Top)

I know you try
So hard
I know you want
So much
I know I act
So difficult
I know we say
So little
I know I hide
So often
I know I am
So sensitive
I hope you know I am
So sorry

I've got a (Secret) (Top)

I never told you about this secret I have
About the life that I’ve lived
About the things that went on inside my head
They will be buried with me
And you will never know
You’ll never know how I felt
What I had to deal with
What I had to accept
Or how I had to hide it
I didn’t enjoy keeping it from you
But I still couldn’t tell you
I’m sorry if that hurts you
But it was my secret to keep
And I never wanted anyone to know

Ignorant Camaraderie (Top)

Why do you make promises
That you can't keep
Why do you think the world
Needs to drop at you feet

Why can't you let it go
And let it all happen
Why do you have to have control
Over every little thing

Why is it hard for you
To let it pass
Why can't you see
That it doesn't have to go so fast

Why have you decided
To let the world control you
Why have you abandoned
Everything you knew

Why does the story change
To suit your needs
Why am I always amazed
By some past deed

Why can't you grow up
And take responsibility
Why can't you realize
That you can be happy

Why do you paint yourself
Into a corner of disillusion
Why can't you see
That you are the only solution

Why do I stay here
Day after day
Why do I let you
Make me feel this way

Why are you constantly
Feeling sorry for yourself
Why can't you understand
That others need your help

Why is love and friendship
A foreign subject to you
Why do you put up these walls
And only let in few

Why do I feel
Like it's always an act
Why do I feel
Like I don't get all the facts

Why do you always
Leave me here in the dark
Unknowing of what is to come
What has been
Or even where we stand
As something akin to friends

Just You (Top)

He's mine
All mine
What?
You don't want him?
Why?
What's wrong with him?
Can't you see that I love him?
Doesn't that mean he's worth something?
Because if he's not...
If he's worth nothing to you,
Then so I am

Keys to Success (Top)

Risk everything
Put forth the effort
Work for your goals
Invision the future
Take pride in your achievements
Attitude is everything

Lies (Top)

Why do I lie to myself
Why can’t I admit the truth
He doesn’t really love me
He’s sucking away my youth

He hurts me and he scares me
He proclaims to me his love
When he says it I believe him
How could I be so dumb

He uses me and abuses me
Convinces me to go on
He cries to me, lies to me
I turn around and he’s gone

I say that I need him
And I love him too
He’s caring and sweet
He’s also funny and cute

He yells and screams
He brings me pain
He always leaves me crying
Time and time again

I still lie to myself
I love him so
Without him I will melt

Quit lying to yourself
You stupid girl
He doesn’t love you
You’re not his world

Give it up, move on
Find someone new
You may learn to love again, to trust again
That’s just what you’ll have to do

But don’t trust the lies that many guys tell
He promised he loved you and would always treat you right
But that’s not what happened
And now he’s forever out of your sight

Lonely (Top)

I sit here alone
I remember a time

when I was never alone
when friends constantly surrounded me

Where have they gone?
Were they ever really there?

Now that I think back

I see what really was -

I was always alone.

Sure, there were always people around
But none of them wanted in

Or maybe I didn’t let them in

I closed myself off

to shelter myself from pain

Pain is all I have now
Nothing’s inside but an empty hole

where love and friendship should’ve been

I thought I had friends

but I guess I didn’t

Friendship requires understanding

is unconditional

But I didn’t know any of them

They sure as Hell didn’t know me

Was it because I wouldn’t let them?

Was I too bipolar -

quiet to crazy

What was I afraid of ...

... being alone?

Well, now I am alone
So what have I accomplished?

a guilty feeling of the past
insincere memories
reminders of my loneliness

What a waste of an existence!

How do I change

what has already been?

I can’t exactly go back

and fix things

Can I?

No, no I can’t.

So, I learn to live with my past

accept what I do have

even if it’s not what I want

And trudge through

the rest of my life

Alone.

Lost (Top)

Once so easy
So natural
Now the most difficult task

Once it would flow
Like running water
But now the stream has dried up

The current has taken it
Far away
Never to return again

But maybe
Some day
It will return

I hope

Lost Love (Top)

I’m glad you called today
It’s been so long
I’m glad you’re doing well
And that you remembered our song

You brought it all back
What life was like then
I can’t believe I’d forgotten
Having you as a friend

I just wanted you to know
That if it hadn’t been for him
Things might have been different
Than they were back then

I always respected you
And knew that you would succeed
I look at you now
And am proud of the life that you lead

I always wondered what it’d be like
If you and I were an ‘us’
If he hadn’t come into my life
And loved me so much

It probably wouldn’t have happened
I wouldn’t have had the nerve
But I’m glad that you found me
And I hope that you have everything you deserve

Mine (Top)

You'll never understand my joys
Or live my sorrows
You'll never rejoice in my prides
Or wallow in my troubles
Nor will you love how I love
Or hate how I hate
You are not me
And you will never truly know

My Guy (Top)

There’s something special ‘bout that boy,
When I think of him, I feel joy.
We are just friends, and that is okay,
I think about him every day.

He makes me happy, he makes me smile,
For me he would walk the extra mile.
Every time I see his face,
I imagine his warm embrace.

My guy will always be by my side,
My love for him I cannot hide.
If you see me, smile so bright,
It’s because this man is right.

My Lesson (Top)

I must learn
that others will not always be there.
I must learn
that I am my only hope.
I must learn
to help myself.
I must learn
that others cannot save me.
I must learn
to share my views.
I must learn
to have confidence in myself.
I must learn
that I am good enough.
I must learn
to feel for myself,
to do things for me,
and to relish in my own greatness.
You will not always be there
to pick me up off the ground.
Your life cannot be spent
teaching me
how to live.
I must learn
to rely on myself
for the proper answer,
the necessary direction.
You have helped me thus far,
but now I must help myself.
I must learn.

Need (Top)

This pain inside me
hurts so bad
And the tears
are so wet
Your kiss
I can still taste
Your arms
I can still feel
Your warmth
is slowly
slipping away
Your absence
is present
It grows
and grows
My soul
is dying
My life
withering
You are my blood
and my breath
You are
my survival
I need you

Ode to Tippin's (Top)

Bus the tables;
Fill the tubs;
Clean them well.
Don’t forget to scrub.

Roll the silverware -
Knife, fork, then spoon.
Wrap the napkin ‘round.
Maybe you’ll get to leave soon.

Stock the pies
And the cornbread.
Wipe everything down.
Do everything he said.

Sweep the floor;
Get every last crumb.
Set a few pies aside.
Soon you’ll be done.

Count your money;
Subtract the checks.
Get it all prepared,
’Cause you’re next.

Hand it over
To the guy you love to hate.
Hear him say goodbye.
No longer will you wait.

The job’s not that bad.
It was quite enjoyable - until -
He showed up,
The one you want to kill.

One day you’ll get fed up,
And he’ll watch his back.
You’ll come up behind him,
And give him a WHACK!

Then your trouble will be over,
And you will enjoy again.
You can continue working,
Wearing a big grin.

Ode to Tippin's II (Top)

Derrick’s tapping his pen on his eye
RJ just caught you in another lie
George is at home, cursing his cat
I’m sure Dave’s got something better than that

The kitchen boys are throwing shit
The customers are throwing fits
The ticket times are getting longer
And the looks are getting stronger

Once again, we’re out of silverware
Ask the dishwashers, if you dare
The hosts don’t know how to seat
And this guy thinks a dollar’s a real treat

Bus the tables, but don’t abandon your "friend"
Or RJ’s opinion he will lend
Wipe down the seats; don’t forget the crumb-catchers
Or you’ll have to listen to more of RJ’s lectures

Who knew $2/hr could buy you a slave?
Where do these people live, a cave?
Show us respect and some dignity
And please, whatever you do, don’t order hot tea

We do this job because we love it
Yah right, I wish I could tell you to shove it
We do this job because we have to
We’re pathetic losers just like you

Ode to Tippin's - Final Chapter (11) (Top)

Scrub it well;
Get it ready to sell.
Say goodbye,
But don't you cry.

Leave it all behind;
A new job you will find.
This is a thing of the past,
So pack it up fast.

No more schedule requests,
Or immature server pests.
No more blatant disrespect,
Or customers you want to deck.

It's time to move on;
It's the beginning of a new dawn.
There is no pain;
Finally you'll be sane.

Goodbye to the drunks,
The bitches, and the punks.
Goodbye to the customers too,
Who apparently were too few.

These are the final days;
I'm sure I'll miss it in some ways.
Goodbye to you all;
It's been a ball.

Our Song (Top)

I took a walk today
And I thought of you
The way you hold me so tight
And won’t let me out of view

I wondered why I let you in
To take control of my life
And decided the only reason was
I wanted to be your wife

But you destroyed all of me
And replaced it as you wished
I blindly held you tightly
Hoping it’d be my lips you’d kiss

But the time has come, my dear
For me to open my eyes
I held them closed so tight, my sweet
I couldn’t feel my cries

I loved you more than life itself
And forgot about who I was
I need to let you go now, hon’
I know there will be other loves

It will be hard to let you go
And I know I will cry for so long
But now it’s time to say goodbye
This is the end of our song

Perfect Perfection (Top)

Perfection
Possibly Pure
Prudent & Productive

Wonderful
Willing to endure
Want & Willful

Rare
Rapture exploding
Reality or Wrong?

Confused
Can it be true?
Cold & Careless

Helpless
Holding on to nothing
Humble & Homeless

Alone
Alas we die
Alone & Alone

Silence
Something, but nothing
Still & Shrill

But Perfect
Perfectly Alone
Perfect, Dead, & Alone

Rhetoric (Top)

Happiness
is an unattainable goal.
Does it really exist?

If I put on a smile,
will you truly believe
that I am happy?

How can one
disillusion themselves so much
as to think
such a feeling
is real?

Happiness
is not reality
but imagination

One puts on a smile
and everyone says
"she’s so happy"
but that is not happiness

So what is happiness,
I ask.
What is it people claim to have
but have truly never known?

Why do I ask questions
that I know have no answers?

The Ring (Top)

A simple thing
A piece of metal
and a stone
so much meaning
so much joy
it brings to me
so insignificant
so small
so meaningful
how is this?
I'm not sure that I understand
a little present
talked of for ages
wished for
the symbol of a day
now sooner to come
the day is more important
what I truly long for
not so much the day
but those after
the years
the love
the being
so small
but a symbol
of so much

Robin (Top)

The sun is shining in the sky.
A little bird learns to fly.
It spreads its wings to take its flight.
It tries and tries with all its might.

Keep on trying, my little friend.
Don’t give up ‘til you’ve reached the end.
It may seem hard when you start,
But don’t let the struggle tear you apart.

Take your time; take it slow.
Sooner or later, off you’ll go.
I know you’ll fly to greater heights.
You’ll soar on through the days and nights.

Keep on trying, my little friend.
Don’t give up ‘til you’ve reached the end.
It may seem hard when you start,
But don’t let the struggle tear you apart.

I know you will have great success,
Because you always try your best.
Keep on reaching towards your goal,
Even when you’ve had your toll.

Keep on trying, my little friend.
Don’t give up ‘til you’ve reached the end.
It may seem hard when you start,
But don’t let the struggle tear you apart.

Rogue (Top)

Watching the rising sun,
riding on the red horizon,
arms wrap around me,
remembering the wrong I had done,
I cried, raging against myself,
realizing his forgiveness,
I began to relax,
and relish in his recognizable warmth

Selfishness (Top)

I’m a needy person
I need too much
I need love
and attention
and your arms
your respect
your confidence in me
I need your lips rested upon mine
I need you here
with me now
Your closeness I yearn for
The heat of your body
your heartbeat
I need your strength
and your security
your ability to ease me
to strip me of my pains
I need to know you care,
that you’ll always be there
and that I’ll never have to worry
about anything
But what about you?
What do you need?
Do you need me like I need you?
Do you cry at my absence?
Why have I never asked?

Shattered (Top)

The walls are coming down again.
Who is going to put them back up?
My heart is breaking again.
Who is going to pick up the pieces?
I am crying again.
Who will catch my tears?
My life is falling apart again.
Who will put it back together?
If I died tonight,
Who would care?

A Sixth Sense (Top)

I hear you
But you have no voice
I see you
But you have no form
I feel you
But you have no substance
I taste you
But you have no nectar
I speak to you
But you do not listen
I know you’re there
But you give me no sign
I know you love me
But you refuse to show me
I know you want me
But you won’t give in
I know you speak to me
But I don’t listen
I know you taste me
But I have no nectar
I know you see me
But I have no form
I know you hear me
But I have no voice
I have a sixth sense
But you have it too

Sunset (Top)

Tonight
I watched the sun set
I saw what everybody sees
I saw the red horizon
As the mountains
Consumed our dear sun
I know you see it too
I know you see the precious sky
Just before night appears
You enjoy her like I do
But why can’t we enjoy her

together?

One thing we both love,
One moment we both cherish,
One event we both could share

with one another

But you refuse
You cannot see
past my outsides
You don’t know my love
Of those things
You hold so dear,
And I fear
You never will
Because

I am not like you

But

I am

Thank God (Top)

I thank God for the day we were together.
I thank God for a day that couldn´t be better.
I thank God for giving me someone like you.
I thank God for bringing together us two.

I thank God that you will always love me.
I thank God that you´re all I imagined you to be.
I thank God that you´re so kind and sweet.
I thanked God when my heart skipped a beat.

I thank God, my love, that I love you;
That´s a power that blesses few.
And if life were unfair and kept us apart,
I´d still thank God, for you´ll always be in my heart.

Thank God? (Top)

Why is life this way?
It carries on day after day.
The hurt, the pain, and the tears.
The sorrow, the loss, and the fears.

Why does love have to be so difficult?
It possesses me, takes over me, puts me at fault.
The joy it brings confuses me.
Because the pain just won’t let me be.

I love him, I do, but I don’t know what to say.
I pray for him, for us, each passing day.
What am I to do? How can I fix what’s wrong?
How can I make his pain not last so long?

How can I make him see that we belong?
How can I keep my love from seeming so wrong?
Our love is strong, but the distance is stronger.
Each day apart grows longer and longer.

The Bible says to thank God, no matter what.
Sure, I understand, I used to, but -
What am I supposed to say?
"Thank you, God, for taking my love away"?

I need him. I need him in my life.
Why can’t I just give up and be his wife?
That would fix everything, you know.
Then my love for him he would truly know.

He just wants to be with me every day.
He just wants to see me whenever he may.
He just can’t stand being apart.
It hurts him, kills him, breaks his heart.

Three options he gave me - one, two, three:
Find someone new, or marry me.
The third is better left unsaid.
Because I wish not to see him dead.

He is everything to me, and I cannot bear his loss.
For if so, my life in the garbage is tossed.
I need him for strength and for life.
Why can’t I just be his wife?

Why is everything so confusing?
Do others find my pain amusing?
I need him here, with me now.
If I could, I would, but how?

How do I bring him to me?
How can I make him see?
If he trusts in me, trusts in our love,
Our happiness will shine down from above.

So how can I thank God for this?
How can I thank him for the love that I miss?
Dear Lord God, I love you so,
But why did you have to make him go?

They don't care; Life isn't fair (Top)

They don’t care;
Life isn’t fair.
No time to explain,
Before you feel the pain.

One little thing,
And you hear that ding.
You come out fighting;
Now you’re writing.

Where did you go wrong?
Will it hurt for long?
They don’t care;
Life isn’t fair.

Untitled1 (Top)

As I watched him leave, I wept
As he went, my love he kept

The tears swelled up; I knelt and cried
He turned the corner, and I died inside

His love burns through, like acid through steel
My life began to shatter; it began to peel

But there he was again, his face all aglow
As he approached, I saw now he was full of woe

He grabbed me up, and he gave me a kiss
I looked at him, at the stars, and made a silent wish

Marry me, he said, with love in his voice
I nodded happily, and then we did rejoice

We fell asleep, holding each other tight
We slept peacefully, knowing we’d be together many more a-night.

Untitled2 (Top)

A field of flowers
All different colors and kinds
Each with its own smell
Each with its own space

One day the weather changes
A flower cries
Its spot is gone
Bare forever

Slowly, one by one
The others did the same
Each wilting
Each dying to dust

The field thins
The color dissipate
The smells cease
The brown emerges

Untitiled3 (Top)

My life abides in you
My world revolves around your head
My feelings are your moods
Your loss is my death

I need you here, with me now
Always and forever
I need you to hold me and love me
I need us to be together

I anxiously wait each day
To hear your charming voice
I carefully listen to what you say
You make my mouth moist

I dream about you at night
Wonderful, special dreams
I know this is right
It is exactly as it seems

Untitled4 (Top)

Once upon a time,
There was a girl and a guy
Who loved each other
More than anyone could know.

Until one day
The guy’s love changed.
Another girl came into the picture,
And there was nothing but heartache.

The girl cried and cried.
The guy seemed not to care.
He turned it around;
He made it her fault.

She hid in shame.
She tried to make him happy,
Tried to keep his love,
But the other girl just wouldn’t go away.

One day, he finally told her
He loved her again
But the next day she overheard him
Talking sweet to the other.

He invited her over
And blew the original off.
She got crazed and cried.
She sobbed and sobbed.

So when will he make his decision?
Which girl will it be?
She needs to know,
So she can start getting on with her life.

But he strings her along,
Making her think she still has a chance,
And she believes him,
Because she doesn’t want to lose the only one who she cared about, the only person who ever cared about her.

Sometimes she’d like to end it all,
Just to stop the pain from tearing at her,
But she can’t, because she still loves him.
She’s afraid of what that might do to him.

Around others she pretends everything’s okay,
Everything is perfectly fine,
But with him, she tries to please,
And alone, she cries.

The pain rips at her until she feel as though she’ll fall apart.
Pieces of her descend to the ground and melt away.

The pain she feels she wishes for none,
This pain, this heartache, this agony.
She will never love again;
She cannot.

She has been ruined, violated.
She will never know how to love.
She cannot let herself go through that pain.
Never again will she.

Untitled 5 (Top)

Breathe
Take it in
Exhale
He’s here

He always is

Protecting you.

You’re safe.

Alone

With your thoughts

But never really alone
He knows

He cares

Even if no one else does

He always will

Relax
Bask in His beauty
Enjoy
He made it

Just for you

And you alone

To share with Him

Smile
Live
Rejoice
He wants it

Wants you to be happy

And live eternally

With Him

Untitled6 (Top)

If I really was a good friend,
I'd stand up to you,
I'd tell you what I thought,
I'd tell you to stop,
I'd make you face the truth,
I'd push you harder,
I'd ask more questions,
I'd not turn the other way,
I'd share my opinions,
I'd not be scared,
I'd not hide,
I'd force you to admit it,
I'd have seen it sooner,
I'd have realized,
I'd know what to say,
That is, if I really was a good friend.

W5 (Top)

Something
is about to happen
Somewhere
it’s starting
Someone
is waiting for me
Sometime
I must go
Somehow
I’ll find out
what, where, who, when, how
maybe even why

Waiting for the Phone to Ring (Top)

He said he would call, but he didn’t

He should have called hours ago

But you sit and wait - he’ll call - you know he will

Get over it you naïve little girl

The boy’s not going to call

Maybe he just forgot - yeah, whatever

He doesn’t care

He’d rather be out with others

Instead of being with you

He has changed

He is different

He doesn’t care - he’s apathetic - even towards you

You cry and wait

Just grow up and move on

He’s not going to call

Waiting for the Phone to Ring - 2 (Top)

Should I call him?

Did he just forget?

Does he think it’s too late?

Is he preoccupied?

Is he avoiding me?

Is he upset?

Is he having a good time?

Does he know how I feel?

Does he care?

Will he call?

Will he come home?

Why hasn’t he called?

Is he okay?

Is he happy?

Is that him?

What's Wrong, My Dear? (Top)

Oh, what’s wrong, my dear?
Why are you crying?
Why did I do, my love?
Why are you sighing?
What can I do to make things better?
What can I do to make you say "I love you" once more?
Why does your heart ache?
Why do the tears pour?

Whatever is wrong, I want to help.
Whatever you’re feeling, I want to feel myself.
Whenever you’re blue,
Whenever things go wrong,
I wish to hold you
And make you strong.

I want to help,
I really do.
Oh, darling, please tell me what’s wrong.
I love you.

Whatta Guy! (Top)

Whatta guy!
He makes me so happy.
He makes me feel so good inside.
He makes my problems disappear.
He makes my eyes fill with happy tears.
He makes my life seem worth while.
He makes me always want to smile.
He makes me feel like a person.
He makes me feel whole.
I know the chances are slim,
That I’ll get to meet him,
Get to see him,
Get to be with him...
Why does life have to be this way?

Main | Other Writings | William's Poetry

Last Updated 04/29/06